Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Because sometimes you just have to laugh at yourself

My friend Gabie, who always sends me the most amazing YouTube videos, sent me this video the other day. I had seen it before, but went into a fit of excitement to watch it again. These guys are pretty much spot on.

Because sometimes I can be that girl, "I don't care. I love myself and I hate myself."

 
Harvard Sailing Team

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

I'm reading books

Me love reading books. They make me smart.

Starting with Amber Brown and moving on to anything by Meg Cabot, then the wide world of magical brilliance in Harry Potter, to historical fiction and now politically driven memoirs. Books are great and are a wonderful escape.

When I was in school, I always looked forward to the summer because I actually had the time for pleasure reading! And now that I am no longer in the process of being formally educated, I have all the time in the world, muhaha world domination. One of the activities that I've been focusing on, besides planning scrupulous plots of revenge and writing to-do lists, is reading!

I read a ton this summer, all good stuff and have read a few great books recently. I would love to discuss them all because that would be fun. Instead I will stick with writing fabulous things about my new favorite author, who I recently discovered: Peter Godwin.

I took a class during my semester in London on the politics of Sub-Saharan Africa that interested me very much. After that class I was intrigued to learn more about the enigma that is Africa. Also, my British/Australian professor pronounced Uganda as Ugander, always entertaining.

I saw a blurb about a book called The Fear: Robert Mugabe and the Martyrdom of Zimbabwe in People magazine. As we all know, People magazine consistently features the most intelligent articles on societal matters to inform the public on issues that really affect us! Ugh, like the relationship status of George Clooney and Stacy Keibler, this is a weird one that frankly I can not support, come on George. Or tells us that Bradley Cooper is definitively the sexiest man alive.

So whatever, I followed People's advice and I thank them because this book was fantastic.

The Fear not only fulfilled my fascination with Africa but illustrated the incredible courage of one man, Peter Godwin, who at some points put his life in danger to report what was really happening, and countless others who stood up and probably still stand up to the tyrannical dictator Robert Mugabe and his minions. Injustices are expertly written about in this memoir that follows Godwin's travels back to the place of his childhood, Zimbabwe.

The book centers on the events leading up to and after the 2008 elections in Zimbabwe which Mugabe and his party ZANU PF (Zimbabwe African National Union, Patriotic Front) lost to the opposition candidate for the MDC (Movement for Democratic Change) Robert Tsvangirai (hmm how do you pronounce that?). However, Mugabe refused to concede and called for a run-off election. Terrifying violence and corruption ensued. As of now Zimbabwe has a coalition government with Mugabe as president and Tsvangirai as prime minister, from all accounts it seems this setup is simply a namesake, with Mugabe still holding all the power.













Godwin's writing can not be characterized as simply a retelling of political events, rather, it is storytelling. I so enjoyed this book. I blabbed about it to everyone.

I also read another book of his called, When A Crocodile Eats The Sun. This is a poignant account of Godwin's frequent visits back to Zimbabwe to care for his ailing parents. It is a more personal story and equally as engaging as The Fear.













Read them!





And check out Peter Godwin's website at http://petergodwin.com/
Or follow him on Twitter @PeterGodwin.

Sunday, November 27, 2011

The product that saved my hair life!

There comes a time in every woman's life when they realize all the beautiful work they have done to their hair to craft it into a well groomed coif has been for naught, because you are quite literally killing your hair. Ahh the days of the daily shampoo, condition, blow dry, straighten and dye job. Halt! hair styling ladies, if your hair doesn't feel like hay yet, it soon will.

Or at least it did for me.

In high school I had a very regimented hairstyle routine. Every morning I would wash my hair, load it with products and blow dry it, then straighten or curl depending on my look for the day which usually consisted of Abercrombie jeans, a north face jacket and ugg boots. Creative and saucy right? Tune to Cher's If I Could Turn Back Time. Gag, my hair may have looked great but that was a farce. Once you placed your poor innocent hands on my strands, you felt dry hair hardened by product. It was nasty.

Phase to college when things got a little lazier, I didn't do my hair everyday and learned the baby powder trick. The locks were slowly revitalizing!

The day I found dry shampoo powder was the day my hair life changed forever. I relied heavily on dry shampoo while I was studying abroad in London. I washed my hair a few times a week and it was a smash!

Switch to me at present moment, I wash my hair every two days and use Moroccan oil and hardly ever apply any heat to it. In other words, I let it air dry. I personally took my hair transformation to the extreme and basically became a hair vegan.

But the thing that started my hair metamorphosis was DRY SHAMPOO!

I've experimented with a lot of dry shampoos and hands down think that Ojon Full Detox Rub Out Dry Cleansing Powder is the absolute best you can get. This stuff smells great and its powder isn't totally white and absorbs into hair very well, unlike some other brands. It also specifically helps with any product buildup, important if you rarely wash your hair.

Look for this at Sephora or other beauty stores:




And here's the website:
http://www.ojon.com/products/4737/Shop-by-Ritual/Shop-by-Ritual-Name/Full-Detox/index.tmpl

Friday, November 25, 2011

My anti-drug(s)

Today while shaving my legs in the shower, my mind started to wander to important, intellectual things that are vital to life and I solved the issue of why Congress can't get anything done. Ha, good one!

I was actually brainstorming ideas of what my "anti-drugs" would be if I had been in those Above The Influence commercials. Remember those, they were in black and white (I think?) and had teens dancing or singing or playing basketball and those activities were their anti-drugs?

These would be mine:

Cheese. My anti-drug.
Quoting movies. My anti-drug.
Being lazy. My anti-drug.
Trying to learn to play chess. My anti-drug.
Avoiding doing things I am supposed to. My anti-drug.
Watching 30 Rock reruns on tv or instant on Netflix. My anti-drug.
Napping. My anti-drug.
Picking at my hangnails. My anti-drug.
Thinking about what I am going to eat. My anti-drug.
Practicing different accents. My anti-drug.
Reading Harry Potter. My anti-drug.
Checking to see how many times my blog has been viewed. My anti-drug.

In all seriousness drug abuse is no joke, but brainstorming your personalized anti-drugs is and quite entertaining.

Thanksgiving is over...

Thanksgiving is over, sadly, but leftovers remain! Triumph! Thank god! Yummy food! Leftovers!

We still have the food with us, lingering around in the fridge, taunting us to eat it and then you slowly make a dent in that pile of stuffing throughout the day, or the crescent rolls, or turkey, or potatoes. The list goes one.

However, that warm, fuzzy "I am thankful for my family and friends (insert whatever you are thankful for)" feeling may be wearing off. STOP, don't let it! Yeah yeah yeah, I know every media outlet tells us to be thankful all year round on Thanksgiving, it's true though! Having gratitude all the time makes you live longer or something.

So keep in mind gratitude (grat-i-tude: the quality or feeling of being grateful or thankful) from this day forward.

For example, right now I am thankful that there is an Indiana Jones marathon on USA. Obviously, my theory is that even gratitude for the little things can go a long way.

Also I am thankful for this guy, my little blob kitty man, Saucer.

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Cute

Mustaches

Oh the fine art of the mustache, or as I like to refer to them as, "staches." I was getting my hair done the other day and was talking to my exceptional hair stylist about mustaches. We began by harping on them hardcore as it isn't the 70's anymore, which equates to mustaches being a sign of creepiness. Like white vans without windows creepy.

Amy, my hair stylist, made the completely mature and kind point that if it looks good, great have a mustache. Whereas, I am more of the evil hyperbole thrower ilk, saying things like "Mustaches are never a good thing, no one should ever have a mustache. I hate them always." Throughout our conversation, Amy and I realized that we don't think we have ever seen a good looking mustache.

I am here to debunk our quickly created "no good mustache theory", Amy would be proud (!), by providing a list of men who rocked a good mustache. All of these men are celebrities. Honestly, after the mustache convo, all I can notice are staches... and most of them blow.

Not these guys though:

1. Omar Sharif in Funny Girl. All cards out on the table, Funny Girl is ultimately one of my favorite movies. I know it will stand the test of time. This one will never be a passing fad in my movie love filled life. Omar wins first place for this prestigious, homemade, best staches award because he is handsome, exotic, interesting, timeless, beautiful and has a killer stache! From Nicky Arnstein to Dr. Zhivago, Omar is the man through and through.





2. Matthew McConuaghey in Dazed and Confused as David Wooderson (his cameo in this movie was pure awesomeness). He played a creep and the stache totally highlighted it. But Dazed and Confused is a classic and set in the 70's when staches were the thing! I give him a big thumbs up for this one; you can barely see it!


3. Tom Selleck at any age, any way with that stache of his (shout out to my mom, she loves this guy). He actually pulls off the mustache and it's thick which I think is an important element for any stache to have a chance. I feel comfortable with this stache.
4. Jason Sudeikis. Although I'm glad to report that his stache seems to have been a phase, he maintained a nice one. Yeah it added a slimy facet to each character he played, but it worked because it was kind of cute and funny. And I just really like Jason Sudeikis so his stache gets recognition on this one. We need someone to show us that a mustache can work in the 21st century!
5. John Waters. You don't know who he is? I don't expect you to. No one really does, except those who have a love of camp, the original Hairspray or who have taken a communication class on him in college, like moi. Once you see this mustache you will recognize him and then decide to hate me because it is probably the most horrendous stache OF ALL TIME. Is it even a stache? No it is painted on! I will defend John Waters and his mustachness in short, because I studied him for a whole semester and got to hear him speak live. He's entertaining and I liked his character. Warning though, never see any of his movies made before Polyester unless you have a stomach made of steel.
 Yeah, that guy. 

6. Tom Berenger in The Big Chill. This movie was so good. I loved it. I've only seen it 1 and a half times, but may need to make it part of my collection. The man looks phenomenal with this stache. He pulls it off so well. I want one, if only to garner half the sex appeal he got from his mustache.
This cast picture was the best one I could find that really only gives Tom and his mustache a fraction of the hotness credit they deserve. You can totally tell from this photo though that he and his stache are too cool for school.


In conclusion, through my stache research, I now have faith that there are others out there that have the stamina, personal confidence and unique sensibility to showcase a mustache that does not make me want to run away. And I take my hat of to you, staches.

Falling Bottoms

And so the story of "falling bottoms" begins. Let's be honest, shall we? Falling bottoms was just a funny thing that started between my mom and I. I was much younger, probably around 7 or 8 years old and we were brainstorming titles for a children's book. Obviously falling bottoms is a totally, completely hilarious combination of words. No really, I remember not being able to stop laughing when through randomly spouting out titles we came up with falling bottoms!

It was all giggles! It was our thing for a while, bonded like Thelma and Louise or Hoda and Kathy or Drew Barrymore and Cameron Diaz (don't you just want to weasel your way into the best friendship?). We were a mother-daughter combo unstoppable over imagining a countless supply of butts sailing through the air.

Then like that, we moved on to more mature Ally/mom adventures like screaming meatballs at unassuming neighbors. If you haven't already done this, which I'm betting is everyone on planet earth, you must. Hide somewhere out of sight and then yell using that deep lung power, yell meatballs like you never have before. Hide again and listen to the response that your scream of balls of meat incites. We got:

Neighbor 1: "What was that?"
Neighbor 2: "I don't know, I think someone said 'meatballs'?"

Falling bottoms kind of fell by the wayside, only popping up sporadically, but creating giggly gigs and happiness every time. When I was thinking of a blog title, I didn't want it to be too deep or descriptive. In a moment of epiphany, I thought of falling bottoms! It was decided, that would be the title of my blog. The title signals a wonderful memory. Or extrapolating further, the idea of falling on your bottom and getting back up every time could work. But ehh why push it to the inspirational limit.

I like to take falling bottoms at face value, the butt face value because when aren't butts funny?

P.s. I googled images for "falling bottoms" so I could add a picture, but the results for that just got random and weird.

Like this one, which I actually kind of like and so we'll go with it.

Thursday, November 17, 2011

A beautiful mess

My favorite song in the entire world came on my Jason Mraz Pandora station while at work today, A Beautiful Mess. I would testify in court that Jason Mraz's music literally speaks to my soul, which would result in my incarceration because whaaa? Creepy, J. Mraz's music cannot speak to a soul. But it does, I would proclaim vehemently!

I had the most incredible opportunity to see him in concert this summer at Summerfest.


Me being super excited with Jason in the far background. Let's not talk about the odd lighting and how alien I look.

The experience was, lifechanging.


(My mom and I once heard a review of the movie Avatar that described it as "lifechanging." Avatar was cool and it blew everyone's mind because it was the first great success of this new 3D phenomenon. Lifechanging though? Not for us, except maybe when the avatars connect the end of their braids to their horse creature's tail. That was trippy. We found the vocabulary of lifechanging entertaining and have adopted the term into our everyday lives.)

Back to Jason, his music is like the tune of a million angels. One of my wishes in this world would be to have someone dedicate the song A Beautiful Mess to me.

And that was a long drawn out way of introducing my favorite lyric of that song:

"And what a beautiful mess this is
It's like taking a guess when the only answer is yes
Through timeless words and priceless pictures
We will fly like birds, not of this earth"

LIFECHANGED!

Video for the live version of this song off A Beautiful Mess: Live On Earth.


 (p.s. notice the guitarist in the white button up holds a striking resemblance to Ellen DeGeneres)

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

How to workout like a madwoman

I try my hardest to workout 5-6 times a week and the majority of this workout time is committed to cardio. I love doing cardio. I feel accomplished and happy when I finish my run, bike ride, or time on the elliptical. Sometimes I get so into the motion of my cardio it becomes mesmerizing and the time flies by, but for those days when I check the time every 2 seconds and seem to be making no progress, I must unleash my secret weapon.

This secret weapon is!...Not so secret because I'm pretty sure most every woman has used it at some point in their lives; it is simply daydreaming. Positive visualization of sorts. For me, once I feel like I'm sloughing through a workout I tap into this trick.

Most times I like to pretend I am a celebrity with a super toned body and a wicked outfit. As my famous self, I enjoy visiting one of the late night talk shows or being on the red carpet having dramatic, mysterious eye contact with my ex (Leonardo DiCaprio) or caught in a super flattering paparazzi photo. I always have a good hair day, never have a blemish or feel bloated.

The point is I look breathtaking with a body that you see on the cover of Shape or Women's Fitness (not a stick thin board) and in that moment at the gym I am working towards that body! For example, today I was on the Ellen Show (I was watching the Ellen Show which spurred my imagination) and I was wearing black leather mini pants, red suede pumps and a sheer white button up with tiny gold buttons, buttoned all the way and a loose "romantic" french braid talking about my latest amazingness. It was superb and perfect, slam dunk. This is me though, to some of you imagining yourself in this outfit on the Ellen Show is appalling, to that I say I hate you, not. To that I say you must see this outfit and you would be a believer.

But really, everyone's cool daydreaming, workout fantasy trick is entirely their own and different. You just have to be a kickass you and I promise it'll work. Motivation!

Today the last thing I wanted to do was break a sweat, but break a sweat I did and I killed that workout. I was in sexy leather pants on the Ellen Show!! I WAS Halle Berry sexy cat woman in those pants, man.

And so ladies (said to a group of ladies that I am envisioning are reading this with devotion) when you want to workout like a madwoman you envision your warrior goddess self. Like J. Lo in Enough.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

The worst and the best of it all (for today)

I like to say that people, places or things (nouns!) and events are "the worst", basically anything can quickly be labeled as the worst. I find this to be a descriptive way to easily share my feelings on said nouns or events. Also, it's fun to confidently proclaim "Ugh that's the worst." Things that are the worst change daily and sometimes what was the worst yesterday could be the best today.

Here is my list of the worsts for today and to offset what could easily depict me as a debbie downer, pessimistic, shallow loser I will also provide a list of the bests.

THE WORST (listed in no particular order):
-fresh nail polish chipping (Essie is the best, but why does it chip so easily!?)
-when your feet are cold
-not being able to find the remote
-having to pee all the time (always happens to me, is my bladder small?)
-when you have food in your teeth and don't know it
-the phrase "Hells yeah"(Hells no. Never. Say. This. Again)
-capers
-not being able to get a combination lock open. 

Quick story, this traumatic event once happened to me at a gym I was a member of a few years ago. This was an Equinox gym, these are like a 5 star hotel. I want to live in this gym. One of the great perks to Equinox gyms are their crazy good locker rooms, providing towels, razors, shampoo, conditioner, body wash etc. Clean and pristine.

So I'm in the locker room in my towel and I can't get my combination lock open. I have no friends or acquaintances at the gym at this point. I am stranded, alone and naked except for a small, skimpy, stupid towel (for now, the towels and amenities of the Equinox locker rooms are not so exciting, they suck because I hate this moment and these towels).

I am getting frantic. I easily get frantic when weird things like this happen or I get lost driving somewhere. I can't get the lock open, my hands are shaking like I am Charlize Theron in The Italian Job when she has to open that intricate lock in like .5 seconds; I am only dealing with a combination lock like a 6th grader in the halls of middle school. Some old woman in the locker room senses that I am on the verge of tears and that I am young and scared. She is clothed, so she gets an employee to help. They bring in an industrial size cutter thing and have to cut my lock off!

And then I start to sob.

This is why not being able to open a combination lock is horrifying and unsafe. Always get the key locks and do not lose your key.

THE BEST:
- a good hair day
-peanut butter toast
-The Gilmore Girls
-when you perfectly parallel park (this never happens to me, but it did once and I wish someone could have caught it on tape)
-the first use of a new mechanical pencil
-Helen Mirren
-playing "Chuck, fuck or marry"
-eating cheese
-when a good song comes on the radio (lately this song has been "Run Around" by Blues Traveler or "Ironic" By Alanis Morissette)

Monday, November 14, 2011

The Ambassadors

My good friend Mj attends grad school at the University of Reading in England, we met while studying abroad in London our junior years of college and that lucky guy went right on back across the pond. He had a facebook status today admitting that although he is studying art history in England he had yet to visit The National Gallery!! Blasphemy.

For the record, one of my absolute favorite things in London is The National Gallery. And I graduated with a major in history, but sometimes think I would have loved to have followed art history academically.

Mj's status made me reminisce of the visits I had to The National Gallery and how I always ended up standing in front of the painting The Ambassadors just staring in awe. I have such a strong pull and interest in this painting I frantically bombarded my friends while abroad with excited cues of

"Have you seen The Ambassadors yet? YOU HAVE TO GO LOOK AT IT, IT'LL BLOW YOUR MIND."

Naturally, they thought I was slightly maniacal. Viewing art and the sentiments that people can attach to certain paintings is such a personal thing that I understand I can't expect others to share in my love. But this painting is mysteriously beautiful and so you should share in my love, right now.

I first learned of this painting by Hans Holbein (the younger) when I took a course on Northern Renaissance Art from an amazing professor I had while in college named Ann Roberts. She was tough, but the shit, and brilliant. She wrote a book on art and nuns, so legit, look it up.

I'll let the painting speak for itself. What's most significant to me though is the crazy floating skull in the middle!! And the mystery behind what the painting really means, the deeper meanings behind the images, as there is much academic debate on this subject.

 More info from The National Gallery website
http://www.nationalgallery.org.uk/paintings/hans-holbein-the-younger-the-ambassadors

Sparkling!


 Sofia Blanc de Blancs

I happened upon this at the grocery store yesterday and had to get it immediately, mostly because it was pretty wrapped in pink cellophane! Then I saw that it was a white sparkling wine from Francis Coppola's (yay The Godfather!) winery, named after his daughter and cool director chick Sofia Coppola. Needless to say, in my cart it went. My mom and I treated ourselves to it last night and it was delicious. Super light and with a nice subtle sweetness. I recommend!

The website for Sofia Blanc de Blancs. Notice they suggest you pair it with goat cheese...I fucking love goat cheese.

http://www.franciscoppolawinery.com/wine/sofia/blanc-de-blancs

Sunday, November 13, 2011

Why I want to be best friends with Emma Stone

I had just recently vowed to myself that I would start religiously watching SNL because it's funny and I don't have anything exciting to do on Saturday nights anymore. So this Saturday was to be the start of my SNL journey and I realized Emma Stone was hosting!!!!!!!!!!! I felt like this was an obvious sign from greater powers of my should be BFF status with Ms. Stone.

Sidenote, I often times find what could be simple coincidences to be signs from the universe. Maybe irrational, but it works. Emma Stone's stellar performance on SNL last night created perfect timing for a blog post on why we should be best friends.

The reasons are pretty simple. I've been a fan of Emma since the glory days of Superbad (maybe one of my all time favorite movies), but I'll save the conversation of my devotion to Jonah Hill for another time. Although, I will comment that sometimes I find myself daydreaming of strolling down the street with Emma and Jonah on either arm just reveling in our happy friendship...

Emma is funny, cute, beautiful, seems smart and down to earth and genuine. Most of all she, I like to assume, is pretty normal. It's refreshing in a time when most Hollywood starlets are airbrushed to perfection in a cookie cutter frame. I mean I don't know Emma but I hope all my observations of her are true. Also if we were friends I am certain she would set me up with Ryan Gosling because she's got those connections from Crazy Stupid Love yo!

This was my favorite sketch from SNL last night. WHO HASN'T CRIED TO ADELE'S SOMEONE LIKE YOU! If you haven't at least thought about shedding a tear, you have no soul.



 Also this,

Saturday, November 12, 2011

The first post...

Ok here it is, I'm starting this blog because I need a hobby and I like to write. Papers were kind of my thing in college because wait for it...I actually enjoyed writing them! I just graduated (6 months ago), I have a great internship and I live at home.

At this point a quote from the classic movie and one of my personal favorites, Wayne's World, comes to mind:

"My name is Wayne Campbell. I live in Aurora Illinois, which is a suburb of Chicago..Excellent. Ok, I still live with my parents. Which I admit, is both bogus and sad, but I still know how to party... I've had a lot of joe jobs, nothing I'd call a career."

My parents are awesome so I don't mind living with them, but as any semi recent college grad can attest to, the time right after graduation when we are all figuring out that elusive thing called the future is weird and tough and scary. And obviously the aforementioned quote by Wayne Campbell completely sums all these sentiments up, duh.

So with some extra time on my hands as I apply to grad school, I figured why not start a blog? Although in general my blog will probably end up discussing many facets of my life, I'd like to propose to focus on a few of my favorite things: health/fitness, food and entertainment (books, tv, movies) and maybe provide some commentary on current events if I'm feeling gusty. I should also add that I thoroughly enjoy quoting movies.


I shall explain the significance of my blog title "Falling Bottoms" at a later date in an attempt to keep the mystery alive...(insert evil laugh)